Ah Love.

We're one week away from the one day a year where we're supposed to celebrate our love. Today? Not so much. In fact, you have a week to broom that baggage.

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The website illicitencounters calls today Red Tuesday. Today begins a glorious week-long cleanse where people all over decide, "I'm gonna dump that loser before I blow a hundred bucks on them one more time for Valentine's Day."

Good call. It's decisive and clean. Four out of five people did it so that they wouldn't feel guilty FAKING their way through things for at least another week.

In fact, I've found people live in a spiffy world of spite pretty much every day other than Valentine's Day.

Buzzfeed has a great piece on some of the pettiest ways people have gotten revenge in a relationship, like putting a shrimp in the hollow part of a curtain rod and closed it up after an argument. I also like cutting the nipples out of shirts, but my favorite is changing the Netflix password after the second-to-the-last episode of a series binge watch. Oh that's bunk.

Look, if you're on the fence, just get it over with. You won't spare yourself the gut wrench of a break-up, but you'll be better off financially and open to the possibility of a spanking new hook up by next Tuesday. Besides, you can tell yourself, the average couple only spends 7 minutes a day being romantic and almost a third of all couples have NEVER gone on a romantic trip together.

Want more reality? 41% of women in relationships say they're DREADING Valentine's Day. 44% aren't expecting to get any gifts and 34% would rather watch TV that night than get-it-on. And if it does come down to making the beast with two backs, 43% don't want to try anything new. 2 in 5 say the corniest thing you can do is the serenade thing and 1 in 5 would not allow you to tie the legs back like a Tyson chicken if you put rose petals on the bed.

Peace and Love

 

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