1. When you get to work, put smoked meat sticks or fish in each arm pit and see if anyone notices that you smell different.

2. Play Marco Polo in the back yard while pretending to swim.

3. Place a brown paper bag in a cheap picture frame and label it Rattlesnake Mountain.

4. Call your favorite store every 10 minutes to see if they got more furnace and a/c filters in yet.

5. Post pics like the one below, telling everyone that this wildfire smoke is killing you and let the trolls have at you!

Steve Woods/TSM