Washington’s 10 Totally-Not-Official Rules for Halloween Candy

As a kid growing up in Washington State, I've always looked forward to Halloween. My first Halloween costume when I was eight years old was dressed as an indian scout. I loved westerns as a kid.

Candies That Should Be Illegal In Washington State This Halloween (But Sadly Aren’t)

One of the best parts of Trick-Or-Treating is when you end up going to a house that has full-sized candy bars (the best), but you also encounter some unusual houses like the one dentist that gives out toothbrushes.

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Don't get me wrong, I was always grateful for my haul, but I thought it would be fun to jot down 10 candy dos and don'ts for this upcoming Halloween night - of course, these 10 are all just for fun, so don't take it so seriously.

1) Candy Corn Quarantine – Only three pieces allowed per person. Any more and you’re automatically on a watchlist.

The Unwritten Laws of Trick-or-Treating in Washington State

2) No Raisins in Disguise – If it comes in a little red box and pretends to be candy, it’s contraband. Straight to the trash. No one has time for that.

3) Licorice Blacklist – Black licorice must be declared at the door. Children may file a formal complaint with their HOA. I'm OK with Red, though.

4) The “Fun Size” Fine – Anything labeled “fun size” that is clearly not fun (one Skittle??) is punishable by a side-eye from every trick-or-treater. Go large or go home here in the Tri-Cities.

5) Toothbrush Trafficking – Handing out dental hygiene products is a Class A buzzkill. Penalty: Your house gets TP’d. (just kidding, TP is expensive these days)

6) Peanut Butter Cup Priority – By state law, Reese’s must be shared with your parents. (At least that’s what they’ll tell you.) My sons always had to give up a few Reese's.

7) Melted Chocolate Mandate – If you hand out melted chocolate because you left it in the car, you’re banned until 2030. I might give a pass on Hershey's, though.

8) Popcorn Ball Prohibition – Homemade popcorn balls must be registered with the Department of “Nice Try, Grandma.”

9) The Almond Joy Accord – If you trade away an Almond Joy, you’re legally required to receive two Kit Kats in return... I don't make the rules, but I like it.

10) Pumpkin Spice Clause – Any candy labeled “pumpkin spice” in October is immediately suspicious. Proceed with caution.

Of course, these are all for fun, but I still caution you if you have broken any of these dos and don'ts before.

If so, this is your year for redemption and time to break down and head to Yokes to buy those full-size candy bars.

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