It's a simple question for the fellas, not that you can do much about it on one front, but would you rather have a giant hog, or be short peckerd and rolling in the dough? Well-endowed, or a giant endowment?

Do you know people who see a man driving an ultra fancy car and immediately insinuate it must be to overcompensate for his small junk? Sour grapes, dude? Jealous, much? Oh, it's true, you say? Yes, a new study lends further credence to the cliche of small packages, as in, the tinier the Johnson, the bigger the bank account. Really.

Some new scientific data has come out and confirmed what we've all but assumed, the smaller a man is in the pants, the more money he makes. The question is not DOES size matter, but WHAT size matters? Men who are more than eight inches down there, south of the belt, earn an average of $35,700 (hey, that's almost my yearly wage...hint hint, wink wink) and the average salary goes up as junk size goes down.

Men with a three-inch hammer or, gulp, less? On average, they earn the MOST at $76,780. The survey commissioned 997 men to answer questions about work, salary, and willy dimensions, to see if there is a correlation between size and salary.

Mature fisherman holding a fish and taking selfie isolated on white background

So, the researchers found that every time you drop an inch, a man's average salary goes up until you get to the men who are only THREE inches, pulling in an average of $76,780 a year? Yes, those gifted with a pimple penis, make twice as much as Long Dong Silver.

The study also found that the smaller your kibbles-n-bits the more likely it is that you've been promoted in the past five years.

So, guy, what are you? Well-hung or well-off?

Hey! Look at My D*** Pics!


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