Ozzy Osbourne — who has often said in interviews that he is "lucky to be alive" after decades of substance abuse, casual sex and drinking — wants his funeral to be "a celebration, not a mope-fest."

In his health column for the Sunday Times magazine, the 62-year-old Osbourne writes, "I don't care what they play at my funeral; they can put on a medley of Justin Bieber, Susan Boyle and We Are The Diddymen if it makes 'em happy — but I do want to make sure it's a celebration, not a mope-fest (sic).

"I'd also like some pranks maybe the sound of knocking inside the coffin, or a video of me asking my doctor for a second opinion on his diagnosis of 'death'. There'll be no harping on the bad times. I don't want my funeral to be sad. I want it to be a time to say 'thanks.'"

In 2007, Ozzy and his wife/manager Sharon made headlines when they revealed that they agreed to a suicide pact — because she doesn't want to go through the pain her father Don Arden did when he suffered from Alzheimer's.

Sharon claimed she and Ozzy made the mutual decision after music mogul Arden lost his struggle with the neurodegenerative disease and died, aged 81.

She said, "We believe 100 per cent in euthanasia, so have drawn up plans to go to the assisted suicide flat in Switzerland if we ever have an illness that affects our brains. If Ozzy or I ever got Alzheimer's, that's it — we'd be off. We gathered the kids around the kitchen table, told them our wishes and they've all agreed to go with it. There's no way I could go through what (my father) did, or put my kids through that. My father deteriorated at such a rapid speed he became a shell of himself. Some say the disease is hereditary so at the first sign I want to be put out of my misery."

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