Newport, Oregon Cops: Don’t Call 911 If Out of TP!
Apparently, it's been a problem? Enough so, they posted about it.
Newport, OR Police have officially posted on their Facebook page, to NOT call them in the event you run out of toilet paper. Hmmm...
From their Facebook page:
"It’s hard to believe that we even have to post this. Do not call 9-1-1 just because you ran out of toilet paper. You will survive without our assistance.
In fact, history offers many other options for you in your time of need if you cannot find a roll of your favorite soft, ultra plush two-ply citrus scented tissue."
They go on to describe a number of 'ancient' and historic methods used before wonderful 2-play was invented. To see them, click on the button below. The one we thought was the most humorous was how sailors adopted using a sea sponge tied to a rope, soaked in sea water. How wonderful!