I'm learning more and more that anything imaginable is possible now because of the Internet. So, go ahead and feel stupid for playing that stupid "Fruit Ninja" game. I know I said "stupid" twice. Make that three times. I'm trying to make a point. If it were real, you'd look like THIS guy, who reminds me of this guy. Does watching this remind you of this guy?

Coming soon, Real Life Candy Crush Saga. Dear God.